Urker May 20^th*  1896

My dearest and best Son,

            Although I am become very bad at writing, I must endeavour to write a line in reply to your of the 9^th & 15^th of April. I see you did not forget my birthday; but you mistook the day; it was the 10^th not the 11^th of April that I began my earthly pilgrimage; & a weary pilgrimage it was for many a day; & would be till this day; only that I had a good God and a good Son. Blessed be they both.

            I see you have a good memory for old stories. You & I were both right about my death. Had things continued as they were at that time, I could not have lived very long; for mind & body could not very long have sustained the strain that was on them at that time. Yet, I must have been in a fit of despondency at that time for in general I hoped to see the goodness of the Lord in the land of the living; & I always wished to live for the sake of my children. I often said that if I could never do more for them than give them a good advice & pray for them, they would be better to leave me than to want me. But faith & courage will fail sometimes; even King David said that he would one day fall by the hand of Saul; though he had been anointed by the prophet Samuel, King of Israel. The experience of my dear Mother [1] & of dear Sally McCullagh [2] was a warning to me; they both wished to die. I cannot help thinking it a selfish wish. I would rather live & take share of whatever was going, good or evil. I think you took very much after me. In one of your late letters you said that the longer you lived, the more you agreed with my opinions. [?] will always be, for I hold no opinion that is not founded on reason & scripture. Speaking of old stories, do you remember the day in Connaght that you said that your birthday was on the griddle & the griddle turned & the birthday fell into the fire? I always celebrated my children’s birthdays, in my own poor fashion; for I took every child as a blessing; according to the old proverb, “Hope for the best, & maybe it will happen”.

            I cannot tell you how much I was gratified by the reports of the entertainment that was given to Claude [Macdonald?] [3] at which you were Chairman. To think of my Son being so honoured, & spoken of! If those who trampled me down & made little of me had lived to see this day; what a change it would make! People should never forget that “the earth is the Lord’s & the fullness thereof”. I always taught my children never to despise any one for those who were beneath them now, might be above them hereafter; & never to envy any one, for if they could see the future, they might see those were now liable to be envied, might hereafter be ones to be pitied than envied.

            Dear Tom, teach your children the same. Look at the McCullagh family; grieved I am for them, & I paid a sorrowful visit the week before last, to bid farewell to Derryvalley [4] . The house is very much out of repair, the garden a wilderness & every thing outside & inside had the auctioneer’s hammer cracking over it.  I did not see it on the day of the auction but the day before. [Jemmy] McCullagh [5] is gone to live in lodgings in Warrenpoint [6] . He looked very ill and poor. Sarah [7] is deeply grieved at the loss of the old place. The McCullaghs of Drummuck [8] are much as usual; & I think I have got your securities put upon a proper footing so that there will be no loss, excepting some interest which I know you do not grudge. How true is that scripture The good are taken away from the evil to come. Derryvalley [9] & Drummuck [10] are sold & Shantanaugh [11] is burned to the ground. If dear old grandmother [12] had lived to see these things & many more they would have grieved her to the heart.

            Now for house news. Urker [13] is in full flower, & never looked better. I am in good health but very deaf and infirm; still however able to walk about. Mary Griffin [14] & Mary Menary [15] are in Dublin & Eva Reed [16] is staying with me in their absence. I had a letter from Minnie [17] today; all were well, except that Bee [18] had a sore throat. Minnie longs to be here to get some rest & quiet, but cannot come just yet; as she is going to Eastbourne [19] .

            Olivia Mcready [20] is dead, & had left ₤500 of which Mary Mccready [21] will probably get half; but she is not yet sure whether Olivia made a will or not. Mary Mccready is gone to live with the McCullaghs [22] in Drummuck & seems to be very comfortable there.

            Cavananore [23] never looked better than it does now; it has another “house” on it (as John McCabe [24] used to say) since it got out of Cousin Sam’s [25] hands. If he had had it much longer, it would not have been much worth. Liscalgot [26] people are all well. So are Jemmy [27] & Lizzie [28] . Tom Brown [29] is home, he is [never?] changed in the East than you are.

            My income is not as much as it was formerly. Cavananore does not pay me much more than half what it did; for Sam Bradford put it in the Land Court & got the rent reduced; & Derryvalley & Tullyvallen [30] being a joint property are in the hands of the Receiver who has been appointed over Sam’s property; but eventually I am told, we will get our share. Aunt Donaldson’s [31] money pays me only 2 ½ per cent. It is in the Belfast bank. I wished to put it in the Hong kong Bank, or also to buy Railway shares with it; but that contrary little animal, Alexander Dickie [32] would not allow it. However, I want for nothing & am able to pay my way & keep the constable from the door; thanks be to God and you.

            It is hard to tell when I wrote so much. I hope you may be able to read it. I have not heard from David [33] lately, but some time ago he wrote that he hoped to eat his Xmas dinner in Urker.

            No change in Kilteban [34] . They desired me to thank you for the Xmas box; but I believe I forgot to do so. They were very thankful. If prayers be good for the Hongkong Bank, you & it get plenty of them. Ten thousand times ten thousand loves & blessings to you and yours from your ever affectionate Mother Eliza Jackson.